Name That Toon Captions

• SHUT UP!

• Hmmm, that's strange, I can't see my reflection.

• I bet I could kill a lot of ants with this thing

• Maybe with a big enough magnifying glass I can find something that Bush did right.

• If my tie is not straight I will blame it on Clinton

• I'm so pretty, I'm so pretty, I'm so pretty and witty and GAY!

• How can I look like I am not spinning in my no spin zone?

• "Dorian Gray, eat your heart out." –DamnRebel

• Senator O'Reilly..... Yeah ..thats it, Senator O;Reilly.!!!

• "I'll show Junior and Cheney who the BIGGEST liar is here!"

• "I wanna look just like this on the Summer's Eve package!"-- Joe Weber Costa Mesa, CA

• If Bush can win, then so can I

• All right, you gorgeous brainiac, you've got talking points to sell and guests to slime, God, I love it when it's Show Time!

• Am I shape-shifting back into a lizard?

• Now where can I put this when Ann Coulter sits next to me?

• Gee, maybe I should see a dermatologist. My skin DOES look thin!

• I'm not only good looking, but smart too! If you don't think so, SHUT
  UP!

• Mirror, mirror, in my hand, Please don't let Bush get s**tcanned!

• Do Not Smile When You Lie Do Not Smile When You Lie Do Not Smile When You Lie Do Not Smile When You Lie

• What does Daryn Kagan have that I don't?

• Yep, that's Lisa from AHNC, incognito in the third row. She LOVES me!

• I still can't understand, why Daryn Kagan did not want to date ME!

• Damn, I think my tie is a little too far to the left.

• Damn, I look almost human without my horns

• You are getting sleepy, King George is the greatest, he is NOT Alfred E. Neuman on crack.

• "Laura was right - those Botox injections made me look younger than John Edwards."

• I'm a GOD on TV. Who would dare to contradict me will bring my wrath for all to see.

• Hmm, which side of evil looks best today?Im too sexy for my shirt...Too sexy for my shirt..So sexy it hurtsssss...

• ...maybe if I filed my teeth to a point.....

• Let's see. Lie, lose temper, lie, threaten. Or is it threaten, lie, lose temper, lie...?

• Hmmm... Which of my 3 windows into alternative realities will I use for my source today?

• God, enlighten me with your great Republican wisdom!

• Damn! Being 3-faced is harder than I thought!

• "Oh, shut up"... nah; "Oh SHUT up!"... nah; "Why don't you just shut UP??"... nah; "OK, that's enough from YOU, just shut up!"...nah; "Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!!"... hmmm, that has a bit of a ring to it... "Shut up, shut up, SHUT THE F*** UP!!!"...Oh, yeah, invoking Cheney - now we're getting somewhere...

• The guy in the third row looks intelligent. I've got to get him out of here.

• Mirror, mirror, in my hand, Who is nastiest in the land?

• I'd F*#k Myself!

• Jeesh, ever since signing that contract in blood none of these mirrors seem to work.

• Is that Al Frankin sneaking up on me.

• "Mirror, mirror in my hand, who's the biggest Bush shill in the land?"

• "Why am I looking into a rearview mirror?" --Donna, FL

• Lessee, should I tell him to shutup as soon as he answers the question, or tell him before I ask?

• I don't get it. Where's my reflection? - t.j.

• I've got the only ego big enough for three mirrors.

• WHEW, someone said Franken was about to catch me, but I don't see him anywhere

• .Great! The tie & collar hide the foreskin.