SARAH PALIN'S TIARA
"I want to
say happy birthday today to Barack Obama. The President just turned 48 years
old, if he was ever really born, that is." --Jimmy Kimmel
The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam
Kenyan birth certificate generator
"The Pentagon's concerned that Facebook could pose a security risk to U.S. military personnel. Yeah, because apparently, there's no telling what al Qaeda could do if it knows what a soldier's five favorite romantic comedies are." --Conan O'Brien
Disturbing News
"Former
President Bill Clinton yesterday flew behind North Korea's iron deficiency
curtain and secured the release the two journalists. No guns, no bloodshed, just
a silk suit, raspy southern charm and, based on personal experience, a hint,
just a touch, of P. Diddy's 'Unforgivable.'" --Jon Stewart
Republican-Shenanigans News
"Meanwhile, also this morning, Former President Bush rescued two purple stars from his Lucky Charms." --Jimmy Kimmel
Rock-The-Voter News
"Yesterday, Senator John McCain announced he's going to vote against the
confirmation of Sonia Sotomayor. However, McCain did say he thought she was
great in 'West Side Story.'" --Conan O'Brien
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Biz-Tech News
Bush-Prison-Torture News
"This is
something. Because of the economy, the Postal Service is being forced to close
several hundred post offices around the country. … The Postal Service is facing
a $7 billion budget short fall this year. So in addition to closing the post
offices, they're also raising the price of a first-class stamp. It will now be
$4,000." --Jimmy Kimmel
“But if Dick Cheney puts out a hip-hop album, we're booking him.” - Wanda Sykes discussing who will be her guests on her new television show
Go-F**k-Yourself News
Subject: Take care
I wish you the best. It's times like these when you know who your friends are and you seem to have many wonderful friends to help you through this. I send you good thoughts. Marie, Paris
Thank you Marie.
I look at it this way. My son is alive and my problems are secondary, and that keeps the self pity at arm's length. There are many people worse off than me, in fact, one of AHNC's viewers, Julie, has been seriously ill for weeks. Get well, dear Julie.
Click here for my medical update
If you can, please support All Hat No Cattle
Odd News To Help You Deflate Photo
A photo
released by The University of Cambridge shows a rook, a member of the crow
family, as it drops stones into a tube to raise the water level and bring a worm
into reach, at the Sub-department of Animal Behaviour at University of
Cambridge. In Aesop's fable 'The crow and the pitcher' a thirsty crow uses
stones to raise the level of water in a pitcher to quench its thirst. A new
study published online Thursday, Aug. 6, 2009 in the journal Current Biology
demonstrates that rooks, birds belonging to the corvid, or crow family, are able
to solve complex problems using tools and can easily master the same technique
demonstrated in Aesop's fable.
Peace.
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