Returning to Florida was bittersweet -- two hurricanes heading our way, but Kerry is leading in the Florida polls! It is so good to be back. "President Bush was in Florida where he asked voters to once again send him to the White House. Voters in Florida said, 'Hey, we never sent you in the first place. That was the Supreme Court!' " Jay Leno
U.S. to Get International Election Observers OneWorld.net -- Wed Aug 11, 9:14 AM ET WASHINGTON, D.C., Aug 11 (OneWorld) -- An effort by more than a dozen Democratic lawmakers to bring international observers to monitor the November elections has paid off with an invitation by the State Department to the Vienna-based Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE). .. "This week, G.I. Joe celebrates his 40th birthday. And today, Republicans questioned his military service" -- Craig Kilborn The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
"Republicans are now trying to energize their Amish vote. Dick Cheney is really pandering to the Amish. Today he told a senator to go f--- thyself." —Bill Maher
"When they say they served with Kerry in Vietnam, what they really mean is that they were in Vietnam at the same time. Kind of like how Snoopy served with the Red Baron" -- Jon Stewart on the Swift Boat Veterans For Truth, who have attacked Kerry's military service record Disturbing News
"Secretary of State Colin Powell announced that he will not be attending the Republican convention. Uh oh. So I guess they're going to have to find another black guy." -- Jay Leno
Let the games begin. "I couldn't
get a job with CIA today. I am not qualified."
Editorials on Goss nomination to head CIA Republican Shenanigans
Dub & Dick's Limerick Good News
George W. Bush sucker-punches a rugby opponent at Yale
Bush-Prison-Torture News
Go-F*** -Yourself News
Kerry/Edwards News
Lady Balloonist Needs Help She lowered
her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me,
can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't
know where I am." The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a
hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet
above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100
degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude. She rolled her eyes and said, "You must
be a Democrat." "I am," replied the man. "How did you know?" "Well," answered
the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no
idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not
been much help to me." The man smiled and responded, " You must be a
Republican." "I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?" "Well," said
the man, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to
where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. Biz/Tech News
Please support All Hat No Cattle Please send mail to: All Hat No Cattle PO Box 5237 Navarre, FL 32566 Odd News
A Malaysian giant stick insect rests on an admirer's arm at the London Zoo on Thursday. The species is the longest insect in the world, measuring up to 17.7 inches long. The giant stick insect is just one of more than 100 exhibits at London Zoo's biodiversity and conversation center. (London Zoo/John D. McHugh) Peace.
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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, About.com Guide to Political Humor.
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