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Wednesday edition - June 17, 2009 |

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Sen. Ensign Acknowledges an Extramarital Affair
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Possible threats spur $20M bond for Tiller suspect |
Obama to OK benefits for same-sex partners of federal workers WASHINGTON (CNN) – President Obama will sign a memorandum Wednesday granting health care and other benefits to the same-sex partners of federal employees, two senior administration officials said. |
At least Sen. Ensign is straight. That's a relative "win" for the Republicans these days.
"And then,
after the elections, the supreme leader in Iran certified the election results
and shipped the crooked voting machines back to Florida." --David Letterman

The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam
American soldier killed in Iraq The Associated Press
NH soldier killed disarming bomb in Iraq The Associated Press
After Iraq WMD fiasco, MI6 faces new challenge under Sir John Sawers Times Online
"In a
major speech Sunday, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu called for the
Palestinians to get their own state. Unfortunately, the state he offered them is
New Jersey." --Conan O'Brien
More Threats From North Korea
North Korea warned Wednesday of a "thousand-fold" military retaliation against the U.S. and its allies if provoked, the latest threat in a drumbeat of rhetoric in defense of its rogue nuclear program.

Disturbing News
"Well, the results from Iran's presidential elections are in. And Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has declared victory. But his opponent, Mir-Hossein Mousavi, is claiming ballot fraud and wants an investigation. If that doesn't work, he's planning on making a documentary about global warming." --Jimmy Fallon
ConocoPhillips CEO Gurgles
Government efforts to curb climate change could soon spur an oil crisis more severe than those already experienced, the head of oil and gas giant ConocoPhillips has said...Mulva acknowledged that climate change was a "serious problem" but said attempts to limit the use of fossil fuels through taxes and restrictive regulations will simply raise the cost for the consumer and harm the economy.

Republican-Shenanigans News
House GOP Tries to Keep Pelosi-CIA Controversy Alive CQ Politics
Republican Governor Sues Republican-Led Legislature KPHO Phoenix
The Letterman Protest Nuts You’ve Been Hearing About - Wonkette

Gag Me With A Spoon

Pensacola News Journal columnist Joe Scarborough, the host of the MSNBC talk show "Morning Joe," is on a promotional tour for his second book, "The Last Best Hope: Restoring Conservatism and America's Promise." In his absence his column is being written by show co-host, Mika Brzezinski.
I drank my cup of joe while reading this column and realized I drank a cup of stupid after reading it. The pure and glorious "journalist" Mika should be working for a Public Relations firm. And at the end of her PR piece she takes a shot at fellow MSNBC, newcomer Ed Shultz.

"Election
returns are kind of hard to believe. According to the numbers, both opposition
candidates lost to Ahma-Dinna-Jacket in their hometowns. That's like Barack
Obama losing in the city of Chicago. I'm not, in any way, suggesting Iranian
politics are as corrupt as Chicago, but even Blagojevich is like, 'Oh, they're
good.'" --Craig Ferguson
Rock-The-Voter News

"But there were problems with the ballots in the Iranian election. And who would have thought that? There was a mistake. Thousands of Iranians ended up voting for Pat Buchanan." --David Letterman
Barack Obama: The human flyswatter

Ads by Google
Biz-Tech News
"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

Bush-Prison-Torture News
Ayatollah Kakamami Names Dick Cheney to Iranian Presidency The Spoof (satire)

Ahmadinejad says his election is no less valid than Bush's two. - Grant "Brad" Gerver
Go-F**k-Yourself News
Where in the world is Dick Cheney? He hasn't been on the TEE and VEE lately.
A Father's Day wish: I don't need another tie. I need a job.- Grant "Brad" Gerver Bumper Sticker Division

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Odd News
To Help You Deflate Photo

Pregnant
women with their bellies painted take part in an event to celebrate "Healthy
Maternity Week" in Lima, Peru on May 20, 2009.
Photo/Enrique Castro-Mendivil
Peace.