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Tuesday edition - April 8, 2008
That picture of McCain hugging Bush creeps me out.
News from the medical front: John McCain has been diagnosed with a severe case of "Bushitis." There is no known cure or treatment. - Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
Petraeus Needs More Time
The four-star general in charge of Iraq wants more time in a war that is now in its sixth year. Democrats say he's got until the November elections.
Gen. Petraeus Rocks The Wii Golf - Deadspin.com
"The ambassador to Iraq said today there has been an economic revival in Baghdad. Well, it's nice to see Bush's economic plan working out somewhere." --Jay Leno
Disturbing News
Iraq War Costs
$1.3 trillion for total
economic costs of Iraq war from 2002 to 2008, including interest costs of
borrowing funds, lost investment, long-term veterans' health care and oil market
disruptions,
according to a November 2007 report from Congress' Joint Economic Committee.
"Barack
Obama is narrowing the gap in Pennsylvania, and his campaign is pulling out all
the stops. ... His campaign office is now giving away tickets to Dave Matthews
concerts. Apparently, this is Obama's attempt to win over really white voters."
--Conan O'Brien Republican Shenanigans
The GOP Will Use This If Obama Is The Nominee
The trial of Antoin “Tony”
Rezko, one-time patron to Sen. Barack Obama and Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich,
has turned lurid...Gov. Blagojevich, who's been mentioned often in court, and
Sen. Obama, who's received only passing mentions. They're entwined in the Rezko
saga, particularly through the bounteous campaign money he raised for them both.
Hillary Wants Bush To Boycott Olympic Ceremony
Days before the Olympic torch arrives in San Francisco -- and after protests in Paris and London and at the Golden Gate Bridge -- Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-N.Y.) on Monday called on President Bush to boycott the opening ceremony in Beijing to pressure China on Tibet and Darfur.
"The
Olympic Torch arrived in Beijing Monday, where it immediately suffered an asthma
attack and died." --Amy Poehler
Rock-The-Voter News
"The
Clintons just released their tax returns to the public. ... It turns out that
over the past eight years, they've donated over $10 million to charity. When
they asked Bill Clinton why he gave so much money to charity, he said, 'She's a
really good dancer.'" --Conan O'Brien
Biz-Tech News
"In the wake of the expanding mortgage crisis, the Bush administration on Monday proposed the most far-reaching overhaul of the financial regulatory system since the Great Depression. On the downside, all banking transactions now begin with 'Pick a card.'" --Seth Meyers
Meanwhile, Back At The IRS
One more
tax-season dread: A week before the filing deadline,
Treasury watchdogs said Monday that poor controls over IRS computers could
allow a disgruntled employee, agency contractor or outside hacker to steal
taxpayers' confidential information. Bush-Prison-Torture News
War Crimes
As the first anniversary of 9/11 approached, and a prized Guantánamo detainee wouldn’t talk, the Bush administration’s highest-ranking lawyers argued for extreme interrogation techniques, circumventing international law, the Geneva Conventions, and the army’s own Field Manual. The attorneys would even fly to Guantánamo to ratchet up the pressure—then blame abuses on the military. Philippe Sands follows the torture trail, and holds out the possibility of war crimes charges.
"Simply
stated, there is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass
destruction."- Dick Cheney, Vice President Go-F***-Yourself News
Please help me put food on my family
Offline Donation Lisa Casey PO Box 88 Ashford. AL 36312 Odd News
Peace.
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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, About.com Guide to Political Humor.
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