"Michelle Obama was photographed in London wearing clothes from J-Crew, the store is selling out of the clothes she's been wearing. Now if someone could just get her to drive a Chrysler." --Seth Meyers
 

The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

• US military deaths in Iraq war at 4,266 AP

• Police: Car bomb in Shiite area of Baghdad kills 8 AP

• Soldier killed in Afghan rocket attack DutchNews.nl

• Journalist hurls shoe at Indian minister AP

• Cuba's Raul Castro meets US officials Reuters

• Wives can't say 'no' to sex under Afghan law CNN

Istanbully

Turkish police have arrested a man who claimed he was plotting to kill President Barack Obama during his visit to Turkey.

The Secret Service in Washington said Monday night that Turkish National Police arrested the man last Friday in Istanbul.

Secret Service spokesman Ed Donovan said the president was never in any immediate danger.
 

"The Taliban has decided to modernize a little bit. They're going to stop measuring the lengths of mens' beards. I'm proud of those guys. I couldn't be happier. Oh wait, I know how I could be happier: if they stopped trying to murder us." --Jimmy Fallon
 

Disturbing News

• At least 179 killed in Italian earthquake CNN

• Missing Tracy girl's body found in suitcase San Francisco Chronicle

• Woman says husband killed 5 children to punish her The Associated Press

"When I make a joke about Obama, it's not about all black people. When I make a joke about George W. Bush, it's not a swipe against all retarded people."- Bill Maher

The problem in the Republican Party is not the conservatives or not conservative; it's just rapidly becoming the party of the white, Southern evangelicals. And that party can't win elections. – Sam Donaldson

Obama's In Baghdad

President Obama made a surprise visit to Iraq Tuesday, according to a journalist traveling with him.

Republican-Shenanigans News

• CBS/NY Times Poll: GOP approval rating at its lowest in 25 years ... Examiner.com

• Palin drops fight with Democrats over state Senate seat MiamiHerald.com

• Palin pushes for missile defense funds CNN Political Ticker

• Rejected GOP Chief To Run Again in Va. Washington Post

• Nevada governor in divorce court, accused of infidelity with two women USA Today

• Vt. governor vetoes same-sex marriage bill USA Today

• Judge may dismiss Ted Stevens' conviction today The Associated Press

My retirement fund has lost so much value, it's now a 401K-Mart." --David Letterman
 

Air Space Intervention

The Canadian man who led fighter jets on a chase across six states yesterday flew his stolen plane into the U.S. in hopes the military would shoot him down and kill him, according to a Missouri state trooper who apprehended the rogue pilot.
 

Rock-The-Voter News

• Poll: Majority say Obama has improved U.S. image CNN

• Congress slams defense budget cuts Reuters

It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To

The Democrats and Republicans both came out on top in voting for the not-so-glamorous 2009 Muzzle Awards handed out by the Thomas Jefferson Center for the Protection of Free Expression.

"First Lady Michelle Obama is a huge hit in England. There was a bit of controversy when she put her hand on the Queen's back. The Queen took it as a gesture of friendship, but I think Michelle went a little too far when she tried to feed Camilla a carrot." --Jay Leno

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Biz-Tech News

• Oil prices edge higher AFP

• Royal Bank of Scotland Plans Up to 9000 Job Cuts New York Times

• Quarter of companies globally set to freeze pay: survey Reuters

• Scams target homeowners seeking foreclosure rescue MiamiHerald.com

• Australia to invest $31 billion in broadband Reuters

• Are You Infected? A Smart and Simple Test. PC World

"Conservatives aren't happy with Obama because he basically fired the CEO of General Motors, and they said he's interfering with private industry's ability to run our country into the ground." --Bill Maher

Here’s a sign of the times are a-changin’. The governor of Virginia has signed a new law banning smoking in bars and restaurants. In Virginia. See, that’s significant because Virginia is, like, the tobacco state. That would be like the governor of California banning breast implants.- Jay Leno

Bush-Prison-Torture News

• Chinese Muslim detainees take case to Supreme Court CNN

• Red Cross: Gitmo medical personnel violated ethics AP

"We all say crazy stuff when we're high." - Bill Maher commenting on Rush Limbaugh wanting the president to fail

Go-F**k-Yourself News

• Gingrich: Cheney 'clearly right' that America is less safe CNN Political Ticker

• Axelrod: Cheney never got 'the memo' to act like a statesman Raw Story

"No one is happier about tax season this year than the Octomom -- Nadya Suleman. Think about it, she's got 14 dependents and zero income, she will make 40 grand just for filling out her tax form!"- Jimmy Kimmel

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Odd News

• PHOTOS: Jamaica-Size Ice Shelf Breaks Free National Geographic

• Aussie castaway dog survives four months on desert island  Xinhua

• Shots fly at Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady nups New York Daily News

• Chris Brown pleads not guilty to assault charges Los Angeles Times

• Woman with beer can in hand starts brawl at wake AP

• Almost half of French approve of locking up bosses Reuters

• Man fined for for mailing animal feces on citation AP

To Help You Deflate Photo

This General Motors handout shows an electric two-wheeled two-seat prototype vehicle developed by GM and Segway, which could allow people to travel around cities more quickly, safely, quietly and cleanly, and at a lower total cost. The collaboration has been dubbed Project PUMA(Personal Urban Mobility and Accessibility).
Photo/GM-HO/Emile Wamsteker

Peace.

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