Tuesday edition - April 1,  2008




Rice Returns to Her Mideast Treadmill
TIME - 4-1-08
A workout in the hotel gym at 5 am is how US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice typically starts her day during her frequent visits to Jerusalem.


Iraqi casualties at highest level since mid-2007
Reuters - 4-1-08
Violent civilian deaths in Iraq climbed to their highest level since mid-2007, Iraqi government figures showed on Tuesday, due to a spike in violence between Iraq security forces and Mehdi Army militia fighters

Clinton Says She's in US Presidential Race to Stay
Voice of America - 4-1-08
 Democratic presidential contender Hillary Clinton is sounding a defiant tone in response to calls from some supporters of rival Barack Obama that she quit the presidential race


I can't think of any successes performed by Condoleezza Rice. Not one.


Happy April Fool's Day



The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News


CIA Leak Update


The CIA leak probe cost $2.58 million, the Government Accountability Office disclosed Monday, wrapping up an investigation that ensnared Vice President Dick Cheney's chief of staff for perjury, obstruction and lying to the FBI.

The office of Special Counsel Patrick Fitzgerald spent the money over a 45-month span that saw the indictment, trial and conviction of I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby.

The investigation also touched on other officials in the State Department and the White House, including presidential political adviser Karl Rove, who leaked the CIA identity of Valerie Plame.



"This is what he said in his speech yesterday -- I'm not kidding about this. He said things are good in Iraq because when you fly over it, you can see soccer games. What you can't see from that level is that they're being played with a human head." --Bill Maher







Disturbing News


"It looks like Mitt Romney really wants to be picked as vice president. Did you see the picture in the paper today of Romney talking to John McCain? Show this picture [on screen: picture of McCain and Romney]. Doesn't it look the head of Leisure World explaining the benefits of assisted living to the newest resident? 'Plus, we have Meals on Wheels.'" -- Jay Leno

Fighting For Islamic Freedoms


 Afghanistan's lower house of Parliament passed a resolution Monday seeking to bar television programs from showing dancing and other practices deemed un-Islamic.



Contrary to Reports, Nationals Fans Weren’t ‘Booing’ Bush

By Don Davis


Republican Shenanigans




"MSNBC is reporting there's a chance that John McCain will pick Condoleezza Rice as his vice president. Well, actually, I think that's a perfectly balanced ticket. Right? I mean, he's white, she's black. He's a man, she's a woman. He's always steamed, she's Rice." --Jay Leno


More Condi-ment


Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said Monday that Mideast peace talks are "moving in the right direction" although she warned Israel that it should stop new settlement activities that could upset progress.




Rock-The-Voter News


Barack Obama said Sunday Hillary Clinton ought to stay in the race. Polls show women think it's sexist to pressure her to quit. Ever since the cable news shows switched from opposition to the Iraq war to stopping Hillary, it's gotten very bloody. - Argus Hamilton



Biz-Tech News



Boeing and Iraq


Boeing confirmed reports Monday that it has signed an agreement with the government of Iraq for the purchase of 30 Next-Generation 737s and 10 787 Dreamliners



"The White House is now outsourcing the manufacturing of our passports overseas. Our passports will now be made in foreign countries. See, this is how a global economy works. When an illegal immigrant from Mexico living in L.A. and working in a Japanese-owned company wants to go home to visit his relatives, he uses a a passport made in Thailand that he gets by a calling customer service number in India. You see how it works? This could be the thing that makes Lou Dobbs' head explode." --Jay Leno





Bush-Prison-Torture News



Radio talk-show host Rush Limbaugh has been telling his audience for days now that he could be indicted for encouraging Ohio Republicans to take a Democratic ballot in the March 4 primary in what he calls "Operation Chaos."

Could that actually happen?

Not likely, Ohio officials say.

"We have no intention of prosecuting Rush Limbaugh because lying through your teeth and being stupid isn't a crime," said Leo Jennings, a spokesman for Democratic Attorney General Marc Dann.



Go-F***-Yourself News


“Here’s news from Hollywood. You know Pamela Anderson? Well, she recently had her marriage annulled.” The “marriage lasted two months. I mean,” she “goes through husbands like New York goes through governors.” - David Letterman

I hope you had a good time today

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Odd News



A photo released by the 'Tiergarten Nuernberg' zoo in Nuremberg on Monday March 31, 2008 shows polar bear cub Flocke, bathing in the pool in her enclosure.
Photo/Tiergarten Nuernberg, Ralf Schedlbauer