Tuesday edition - April 1,  2008

I can't think of any successes performed by Condoleezza Rice. Not one.

Happy April Fool's Day

The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News

• US Military Deaths in Iraq at 4011 The Associated Press

• www.iraqbodycount.org

• Two British, one Danish soldiers killed in Afghanistan AFP 

• Kidnapped Baghdad spokesman released AP -

• At least 461 killed in Iraq clashes: AFP tally AFP

• Iraq Refuses to Endorse Summit Statement Washington Post

• Iraqi PM: Basra operation a 'success' AP

• Iraq UK troop reduction delayed BBC News, UK

• Married Troops Can Live Together in Iraq The Associated Press 

• Baghdad's beggars hit the streets again AP -

• CIA chief says Iran has nuclear weapons drive AFP

• Hamas TV puppet "kills" Bush for helping Israel Reuters

• Bin Laden Took Part in 1986 Arms Deal, Book Says Washington Post

• Former Pentagon official pleads guilty in China spy case Christian Science Monitor

CIA Leak Update

The CIA leak probe cost $2.58 million, the Government Accountability Office disclosed Monday, wrapping up an investigation that ensnared Vice President Dick Cheney's chief of staff for perjury, obstruction and lying to the FBI.

The office of Special Counsel Patrick Fitzgerald spent the money over a 45-month span that saw the indictment, trial and conviction of I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby.

The investigation also touched on other officials in the State Department and the White House, including presidential political adviser Karl Rove, who leaked the CIA identity of Valerie Plame.

 

"This is what he said in his speech yesterday -- I'm not kidding about this. He said things are good in Iraq because when you fly over it, you can see soccer games. What you can't see from that level is that they're being played with a human head." --Bill Maher

Disturbing News

• Report: Low grad rates in US cities AP

"It looks like Mitt Romney really wants to be picked as vice president. Did you see the picture in the paper today of Romney talking to John McCain? Show this picture [on screen: picture of McCain and Romney]. Doesn't it look the head of Leisure World explaining the benefits of assisted living to the newest resident? 'Plus, we have Meals on Wheels.'" -- Jay Leno
 

Fighting For Islamic Freedoms

 Afghanistan's lower house of Parliament passed a resolution Monday seeking to bar television programs from showing dancing and other practices deemed un-Islamic.
 

Contrary to Reports, Nationals Fans Weren’t ‘Booing’ Bush

Republican Shenanigans

• Housing chief forced out by contract investigation San Jose Mercury News 

• Citing Vacuum in Party, Long Island Republican Eyes Governorship New York Times

• McCain Far Behind Democrats in Fundraising, But Looking Forward FOXNews

• McCain Expresses Surprise at Iraq Developments Washington Post

"MSNBC is reporting there's a chance that John McCain will pick Condoleezza Rice as his vice president. Well, actually, I think that's a perfectly balanced ticket. Right? I mean, he's white, she's black. He's a man, she's a woman. He's always steamed, she's Rice." --Jay Leno

More Condi-ment

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said Monday that Mideast peace talks are "moving in the right direction" although she warned Israel that it should stop new settlement activities that could upset progress.

Rock-The-Voter News

• Pelosi: Bush should skip Olympic opener CNN

• Obama knocks McCain, says primary fight not hurting Philadelphia Inquirer

• 'Deafening' applause for Rev. Wright as he returns to Chicago church USA Today 

Barack Obama said Sunday Hillary Clinton ought to stay in the race. Polls show women think it's sexist to pressure her to quit. Ever since the cable news shows switched from opposition to the Iraq war to stopping Hillary, it's gotten very bloody. - Argus Hamilton
 

Biz-Tech News

• Oil below $102 on likely Iraqi recovery; eyes on US Reuters

• A New Study Links Cell Phone Use With Cancer WNEG 

• Cuba opens tourist hotels to citizens CNN International

• Some U.S. homes worth less than their copper pipes Reuters

• Laptop, complete with Vista attack code, listed on eBay Computerworld

Boeing and Iraq

Boeing confirmed reports Monday that it has signed an agreement with the government of Iraq for the purchase of 30 Next-Generation 737s and 10 787 Dreamliners

"The White House is now outsourcing the manufacturing of our passports overseas. Our passports will now be made in foreign countries. See, this is how a global economy works. When an illegal immigrant from Mexico living in L.A. and working in a Japanese-owned company wants to go home to visit his relatives, he uses a a passport made in Thailand that he gets by a calling customer service number in India. You see how it works? This could be the thing that makes Lou Dobbs' head explode." --Jay Leno

Bush-Prison-Torture News

• Pentagon pursues Guantanamo tribunal for embassy bombing suspect Los Angeles Times

Darn

Radio talk-show host Rush Limbaugh has been telling his audience for days now that he could be indicted for encouraging Ohio Republicans to take a Democratic ballot in the March 4 primary in what he calls "Operation Chaos."

Could that actually happen?

Not likely, Ohio officials say.

"We have no intention of prosecuting Rush Limbaugh because lying through your teeth and being stupid isn't a crime," said Leo Jennings, a spokesman for Democratic Attorney General Marc Dann.
 

Go-F***-Yourself News

• Cheney spends lunch in Lexington Kentucky.com, KY

“Here’s news from Hollywood. You know Pamela Anderson? Well, she recently had her marriage annulled.” The “marriage lasted two months. I mean,” she “goes through husbands like New York goes through governors.” - David Letterman
 

I hope you had a good time today

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