I wonder if Todd of the Tundra will do snow machine tricks for the reality show? Maybe David Letterman can have Todd on his show to do stupid human tricks.
President Obama yesterday had his annual physical. Annual checkup. Apparently everything is all right. Earlier today, former Vice President Dick Cheney went in for his annual autopsy.- –David Letterman
The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam
"Talking
about presidents who smoked. You remember George W. Bush? Remember him? He's
saying while he was president he would enjoy the occasional cigar. On a rare
occasion, he would have a cigar because he said it helped him think. I want to
tell you, occasions don't get more rare than that, ladies and gentlemen." –David
Letterman Ship Over American Made Mobile Homes And Call It A Day
Another State Department
construction project has gone awry, and once again the builders of the troubled
U.S. Embassy compound in Baghdad are involved. This time, the problem is in
Saudi Arabia .
Disturbing News
I love the biathlon. That’s the sport that involves skiing and shooting the rifle. Or as Sarah Palin and her husband, Todd, call it, “date night.”- Jay leno
No More Mercenaries!
A senior Senate Democrat says the Pentagon should consider scrapping a potential $1 billion deal with the company formerly known as Blackwater because of "serious questions" about the contractor's conduct.
Republican-Shenanigans News
Mitt
Romney is a good-looking Republican from Massachusetts. You know, he’s like that
new senator from Massachusetts. He’s like Scott Brown, but with pants.- David
Letterman
Rock-The-Voter News No Hanging Chads Here
The largest voting machine company in the country bought its biggest competitor six months ago without advance fanfare. Now the Justice Department is investigating whether to unwind the merger that put a privately held Nebraska company in control of the voting machines in nearly 70 percent of the nation's precincts.
"Did you
guys watch the season finale of 'The Bachelor' last night? Well, fans are not
happy that Jake proposed to Vienna instead of Tenley. Yeah, people are very
angry that he picked a lady that nobody really likes. And then John McCain was
like, 'Hey, it happens.'" –Jimmy Fallon
Ads by Google
Biz-Tech News
"But
Obama's physical turned out great. The doctor said a couple of things. He said:
'Cut out the cigarettes. Also, try to stay out of Toyotas.'" –David
Letterman
Should Ulysses
S. Grant, the legendary Union general and 18th president of the United States,
be bumped from his 96-year stint on the $50 bill?
Bush-Prison-Torture News
"More
problems with the auto industry. General Motors announced a recall of 1.3
million cars because of a steering problem. Apparently, the cars are unable to
steer out of the path of oncoming Toyotas." –Jay Leno
Go-F**k-Yourself News
"And over
the weekend, President Bush said that he is writing a book about how he made
decisions while he was president. We have an advanced copy of it here. It's
called 'What Would Dick Cheney Do?'" –Jay Leno
2010 Fundraiser
Please kick in a few bucks to keep All Hat No Cattle Online
Thank you Clay and Richard.
Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312
Email me lisa@allhatnocattle.net Odd News To Help You Deflate Photo
In a photo
provided by Del Monte Foods, Malmute musher Buddy rides the sled as it is pulled
by dog sled racing veterans Danny Seavey, left, and Dallas Seavey, center, and
teammate Mari Troshynski during practice Tuesday, March 2, 2010 in Anchorage,
Alaska, before the first-ever Snausages Man Sled Race. The race benefited local
pet-related charities. Buddy's team won the race. Next year, All Hat No Cattle viewers will
be looking forward to the Palin family participating.
Peace.
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