Thursday edition - March 27, 2008


Thanks to John from Japan for the cartoon idea



Helen Thomas: Cheney believes war is not the people's business
Salt Lake Tribune - 3-27-08
Tell that to President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney, who apparently couldn't care less what Americans think - except every four years at election time.

Military Tells Bush of Troop Strains
ABC News - 3-27-08
US Army soldiers from K Troop, Third Squadron, Third Armored Cavalry Regiment, patrol in Mosul, Iraq Tuesday, March 25, 2008. The northern city is considered by the US military as the last urban stronghold for al-Qaida in Iraq.

US Says Hussein Spy Agency and Iraqi-American Arranged ’02 Trip by ...
New York Times - 3-27-08
WASHINGTON - The Justice Department said Wednesday that Saddam Hussein’s principal foreign intelligence agency and an Iraqi-American man had organized and paid for a 2002 visit to Iraq by three House Democrats whose trip was harshly


“In this….latest audio tape, Osama bin Laden blasts the cartoon showing the prophet Mohammad in a turban. See, this is why President Bush and Osama bin Laden are such enemies. Bush loves cartoons.” - Jay Leno




The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News

Dropping Trou For Cheney


Once you make it past the first check, (if you make it through the first check) there's the routine metal detector and x-ray machine, followed by the side trip behind the curtains for a body search.

Only, this time, I was asked to drop my pants.



“Well, according to a new study by the University of British Columbia and Harvard, money can buy happiness but only if you spend the money on someone else. To which former Governor Eliot Spitzer said, ‘See!’” - Jay Leno




Disturbing News




"The new governor of New York is having an interesting week. David Paterson, who is legally blind, decided to air all his dirty laundry immediately, and it turns out there's a lot of it. First, he and his wife admitted to having numerous affairs. They even held a press conference last week to do it, and then last night, he talked about a history of drug use. ... One good thing about this whole Eliot Spitzer mess is, we finally found out why New York is the city that never sleeps -- everyone's too busy having sex with each other there." --Jimmy Kimmel


Passport Paranoia


State Department workers viewed passport applications containing personal information about high-profile Americans, including the late Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith, at least 20 times since January 2007, The Associated Press has learned.


Republican Shenanigans


"How about that John McCain? I like John McCain. He looks like the guy who gets frisky with the new waitress at IHOP. ... He looks like the guy who watches his Cadillac go through the car wash. ... He looks like the guy in the supermarket yelling into his cell phone, 'I'm in aisle three, Marge. I can't find the brownie mix.'" --David Letterman


Back In The U.S.S.R.


President Bush said Wednesday he will meet with Russian President Vladimir Putin next week in Russia to try to break a logjam between the two nations over a proposed U.S. missile defense system.



Hillary Clinton's campaign admitted Monday she misspoke when she said she was under enemy fire at a Bosnian airport twelve years ago. She just misremembered it. She was under enemy fire when her plane left Washington but not when it arrived in Bosnia. - Argus Hamilton


Rock-The-Voter News


"Democratic frontrunner Barack Obama vacationing now in the Virgin Islands. It's been a while since anyone's used the words 'Democrats' and 'virgin' in the same sentence. You just don't hear that these days." --Jay Leno



"To give you an idea how bad the Democrats are doing, in a stunning reversal, John McCain now 10% ahead of Hillary Clinton and 7% ahead of Barack Obama. And this is after Iraq, a recession, and no healthcare. Imagine how far ahead he’d be if the Republicans had actually done something.” - Jay Leno





Biz-Tech News


"Things are getting more violent in Tibet." To "disperse protesters, Chinese soldiers are now lobbing toys with lead in them into the crowds." - Jay Leno

Bush-Prison-Torture News



Go-F***-Yourself News


"Here's some news from Hollywood. You know Pamela Anderson? Well, she recently had her marriage annulled. ... Her marriage lasted two months. I mean, honest to God, she goes through husbands like New York goes through governors." --David Letterman



I hope you had a good time today

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Odd News



More than 1500 inmates of the Cebu Provincial Detention and Rehabilitation Center perform Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' dance in celebration of a religious festival in Cebu City, in the central Philippines, January 18, 2008. Clips of the prisoners have created a stir on the internet with over 3 million views since it was posted on Youtube.
Photo/Victor Kintanar