We can't catch Osama with unlimited spying powers and the best military in the world but we can let a company in a terrorist friendly country take over our ports.  It's official -- the entire Bush administration is drunk -- it explains everything!

Dick Cheney now says he can't blame the shooting on the guy who got shot. That's because he tried that for the first three days and it didn't work. -- Jay Leno

The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News

• A Look at U.S. Military Deaths in Iraq AP

• Iraq Body Count

• Bomb kills five, wounds 21 in Iraq‘s Mosul Herald News Daily, ND 

• Iraq Bombings Kill 24 People AP

• Marines Defend One of Main Targets in Iraq AP

• Six bodies found in wreck of small plane in Iraq Reuters AlertNet, UK 

• Two Kidnapped Macedonians Released in Iraq ABC News

• Group begins month-long protest over Iraq invasion ABC Online, Australia 

• U.S.-Funded Power Plant on Line in Iraq AP

• Afghan cartoon protesters threaten to join al Qaeda Reuters.uk, UK 

White House protocol: The BUCK stops NOWHERE (or at Saddam).  - Grant Gerver

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No Wonder Bush Wants the United Arab Emirates to Run Our Ports

The UAE is a drug transshipment point for traffickers given its proximity to Southwest Asian drug producing countries; the UAE's position as a major financial center makes it vulnerable to money laundering; anti-money-laundering controls improving -- CIA Website

WASHINGTON (IWR News Satire) - Protests erupted across Japan today as Dick "Deadeye" Cheney continued his shooting spree over the weekend by blasting the Japanese folk hero Booska in the front yard of the Vice President's residence.  Booska survived the attack and currently is in stable condition at the Bethesda Medical Center.  Mary Matalin said Mr. Cheney will issue an apology in about four days on Fox News after his blood-alcohol levels return to normal.   http://www.internetweekly.org/2006/02/cartoon_cheney_shoots_booska.html

"I have to admit that I turned away from the Olympics... Fox had a more exciting sporting event on: Softball with Dick Cheney and Britt Hume." --Jay Leno
 

Disturbing News

• Mexico gas explosion traps 65 coal miners Globe and Mail

• Venezuela's Chavez Says Natural Gas Is for Region, Not US Bloomberg

• Militants in Nigeria's Oil Region Claim New Strike Voice of America

• Ministers try to calm bird flu fear Scotsman

Bush Crusades

As tempers flare and people die in other countries over controversial cartoons of Muhammad, about 150 people gathered at the Islamic Center in South Charleston for calm discussion about what the cartoons and the uproar means.

It’s not the cartoon as much as the feeling that Islam is under siege that set off the firestorm, said Imam Mohammad Jamal Daoudi of the Islamic Center of West Virginia.

“Muslims all over the world feel that Islam is under attack,” he said. “It’s not the cartoon itself.”

Republican Shenanigans

• Chertoff Defends Review of Ports Takeover AP

• Frist: No New Spy Legislation Needed Guardian Unlimited, UK

• Congress thinks about giving FEMA overhaul Sun-Sentinel.com, FL 

• Rumsfeld: US lags in the media war Seattle Times

• Abramoff Counsel Requests Delay The Ledger, FL 

• White House Aims to Protect New Texas Map AP

• The truth of first lady's health habits a bit smoky Charlotte Observer, NC

• A look at Gov. Jeb Bush's legislative accomplishments Bradenton Herald,  United States

Dick Cheney's Indicted Aide Update

A federal prosecutor argues Lewis "Scooter" Libby, former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney, is trying to sabotage the criminal case against him by insisting through his lawyers that he be given sensitive government documents for his defense.

Kids, This Is A Brain On Drugs

Rush Limbaugh has had to back away from part of his criticism over the way the Democrats handled an Ohio Senate race.

When Iraq war veteran Paul Hackett was forced out of the Democratic primary, Limbaugh criticized the New York Times for not saying that the party's preferred candidate is black.

He later found out from e-mails that the candidate -- Congressman Sherrod Brown -- is, in fact, white.

Rock-The-Voter News

• Calif. official certifies Diebold voting systems Reuters

• Md. Gov. Doubts State's Election System AP

Dreaded Secret Service Detail

President Bush tried his own version of winter sports this weekend - two bike rides in subfreezing temperatures - after watching some of the olympics...
 

Good News

• Washington's Birthday or Presidents Day CNN 

Cheney Aide Gets Testy

She was on the Don Imus radio program the next morning, and promptly got into a heated argument about Mr. Cheney with the host.

"He didn't shoot Harry on purpose, but you're handling this horribly and you're just trying to spin me," Mr. Imus said, adding that he wanted to know why the vice president had a beer at the ranch at lunch, as Mr. Cheney told Fox News.

"What are you, his nanny?" Ms. Matalin shot back.

Biz-Tech News

• Oil leaps $1.50 after Nigeria attacks hit output Reuters.uk

• Airbus says seals Indian deal for $2.5 bln Reuters

• Another worm burrows Mac OS X's way PC Pro

• McDonald's sued over french fry ingredients Houston Chronicle

• Google throws out US data demand BBC News

"Dick Cheney gave an interview to Fox News. Some are accusing Fox of giving softball questions. My answer to that is, 'Well, does a vice president shoot in the woods?'" --David Letterman

Bush-Prison-Torture News

• Report: Pentagon Warned on Torture, Abuse AP

Go-F*ck-Yourself News

• Poll: Veep shoulda shot off his mouth New York Daily News 

• Bush Is Stumping; Cheney's Not Hunting There will be no vice ... Slate

• Clinton: Secrecy Sparked Shooting Reaction AP

"Evil Democrat Empire? I got news for you, if we're going to do the Star Wars analogy, the Democrats are, at best, Ewoks." --Jon Stewart, on a Republican spoof video comparing Democrats to the evil Empire in Star Wars

I hope you had a good time today.

Odd News

• Supreme Court to Rehear Whistleblower Case AP

• Calif. Woman, 62, Gives Birth to Baby Boy AP

• Man Allegedly Bites Off Girlfriend's Nose AP

• Vietnam Bans Alcohol in Karaoke Bars AP

• Olympic Cheerleaders: They Won't Rock You AP

• Astronomers offer list of top candidates for extraterrestrial life AFP

• Soviet-era carrier goes under the hammer and sickle Reuters

• Russian women "too strong and big" for figure skating Reuters

Composite of an artists rendering and photograph showing an "aerial gondola" transportation system linking lower Manhattan and Governors Island (R) in New York city, presented at a press conference 15 February 2006. New York has formally solicited "visionary" proposals for developing Governors Island. (Photo by Governors Island)

Peace.