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TGIF/Weekend edition - December 29-31, 2006
Three whole hours Bush worked on Iraq? Only he would release that to the press.
The President says he's "making good progress" on the new war plan. He's already got a title page and the first paragraph. - Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
"Well, it sounds to me like when a drunken surgeon, who is losing a patient, is asking for more scalpels. It doesn't make any sense. I mean, that guy has been clueless from day one with regard to this whole war. And, you know, the one voice that is not heard at all in the situation in Iraq, is the voice of the Iraqi people..." – Tom Morello
The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
"The Bush Administration is always saying, 'We don't hear the good news.' Yeah, because the journalists are saying, 'Cover me, I'm going to the ice machine.'" — Bill Maher
BUSH’S ULTIMATE TRIBUTE TO GERALD FORD
Disturbing News
A giant Canadian ice island has broken off from the Arctic shelf. Claiming that's still no proof of Global Warming, the President vows to reattach it.- Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
2006 Tin Foil Hat Quote Runner-Up
"It's a success that hasn't occurred yet." - Homeland Security Advisor Frances Fragos Townsend, on why Osama bin Laden hasn't been captured
Republican Shenanigans
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger had surgery Tuesday on the leg he broke at Sun Valley. He was standing still when his pole got twisted in his ski, causing him to trip and fall. Of all the tributes to Jerry Ford, this was the most heartfelt. - Argus Hamilton, comedian
Rock-The-Voter News
While soldiers die needlessly in Iraq, the President risks his very own life mountain biking in Crawford. - Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
Biz-Tech News
I could name a dozen things that could use a rewrite in the Constitution, like getting rid of the Electoral College. And getting rid of "corporate personhood." But, for today, let's just start with that vague part about what you can get impeached for. How about, starting unnecessary wars, yes; getting blown, no. - Bill Maher
Bush-Prison-Torture News
Let's get rid of the 22nd Amendment that says you can't run for president more than twice? Because that's just hatin'. If a guy can win the popular vote, he should be able to run, or that's not a democracy. Bill Clinton should be able to run for president in 2008, period. It would be worth it just to see him debate Hillary. - Bill Maher
Go-F***-Yourself News
"According to a new report -- I can't believe this -- according to a new report, marijuana has now surpassed corn as America's biggest cash crop. Corn. Yeah. Yeah, the report comes as no surprise to anyone who has ever tried smoking corn." - Conan O'Brien
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The Stellar Axis land art project is spread out in McMurdo Station, Antarctica, December 20, 2006. (Photo/Jean de Pomereu/Lita Albuquerque Studio) Happy New Year Everyone! Peace in 2007
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