I've said it before and I'll say it again, Con-servatives are Con-stipated.
"Sarah Palin was photographed in
Hawaii this week wearing a 'McCain for President' visor, but she had blacked out
the letters of her former running mate's name. She was going to black out all of
it, but halfway through, she quit." -Seth Meyers
Palin’s Perfectly Plausible Explanation for the ‘McCain Hat Black-Out’ By Don Davis
The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam
FYI: ABC Outs CIA
The U.S. Central
Intelligence Agency (CIA) ran a secret prison in Lithuania where al Qaeda
suspects may have been held, a parliamentary probe in the Baltic state found on
Tuesday.
"In Washington, it looks like the
Senate is almost done with the healthcare bill. Otherwise known as the Joe
Lieberman Insurance Company Preservation Act." –Jay Leno
Disturbing News
"A new poll shows that Tiger Woods'
popularity has dropped from 85 percent to 33 percent. President Obama's
popularity is also at 33 percent, but Tiger had more fun getting there."
–Conan O'Brien GOP Debates Healthcare With Bird Calling
One of the
Senate's most soft-spoken members, Tom Harkin (D-Iowa), unleashed a little
pent-up frustration on Monday, telling reporters that RNC Chairman Michael
Steele was redefining the term obnoxious with his latest histrionics.
"Hey, this is interesting. After
somebody threw a tomato at Sarah Palin during a book signing at the Mall of
America, she went to another signing at a Costco in Utah, where they took all
the tomatoes off the shelves. So instead she got hit by a three pound bag of
frozen spinach ravioli." –Jimmy Kimmel
The Top Ten Comedic News Stories of 2009 - Will Durst
Republican-Shenanigans News
To Obstruct Health Bill’s Xmas Deadline, GOP Plans to Kidnap Santa Claus By Don Davis
"And listen to this. After one single
senator, just one senator — Joe Lieberman of Connecticut — was able to block
passage of the Medicare buy-in provision of that health care bill, some people
are calling for the Senate to begin experimenting with a whole new way of doing
business. Yeah, it's called majority rules. They're thinking of trying it to see
how it works." –Jay Leno
"Oh, and listen to this. It happened
yet again last month. A Georgia couple showed up a day early for a tour at the
White House — you know, just regular folks. Showed up to tour the White House,
somehow wound up in an invitation-only breakfast with President Obama and the
First Lady. Isn't that amazing? The only two people that couldn't get in the
White House this year were John McCain and Sarah Palin." –Jay Leno Rock-The-Voter News
"On Fox News yesterday, White House Senior Adviser David Axelrod said that President Obama hasn't 'given up on achieving something valuable in Copenhagen.' Wow, in one year we've gone from 'Yes we can!' to 'We haven't totally given up.'" –Jimmy Fallon
Planned Parenthood nails it - Democratic Underground
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Biz-Tech News Indian Italian Wine
Two Italian winemakers have become the first foreign producers to invest directly in India, seeking to tap into a growing taste for the drink in the emerging market, their Indian partner said Tuesday.
"The
latest rumor is that Tiger Woods' wife has decided to divorce him. Apparently,
she realized that once she's single she'll have a better chance of sleeping with
Tiger Woods." –Conan O'Brien
Bush-Prison-Torture News
"In China, an animal trainer taught his monkeys Kung fu — and then they attacked him using his best kung fu moves. Luckily, they were no match for the parrot he'd taught to fire a gun." –Conan O'Brien
Insurgents are using a $26 program to hack into our predator drone video feeds. Not only that, but they're getting Cinemax and Showtime for free. - Will Durst
Go-F**k-Yourself News
Last week the state of Texas executed a man with an IQ of 62. Which is a switch from their usual practice of electing them governor. - Will Durst Subject: Goodbye 2009
Lisa, Thank you for getting me through another year of "political turmoil". Speaking of turmoil you sure had your share this year. Your son survives a 15 story fall and you're diagnosed with the Big C. I bet you want to say goodbye to 2009 too! How is your son? Thank you. Janet
Thank you for writing, Janet.
When I found out I had cancer it was about a month after my son survived that fall. I took the news as so secondary in my life to the fact that my son lived. And maybe that was a good thing. A psychological redirection.
My son is doing fine and is back in China teaching English to IT students.
And yes, Janet, I want to say goodbye to 2009 but I don't have a date for New Year's Eve! lol
The Fundraiser is over 2/3 of the way there! Please Keep All Hat No Cattle Online
Holiday hugs to Dee, Tim, Richard, Larry, John and www.makethemaccountable.com
Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312
Email me lisa@allhatnocattle.net
Odd News To Help You Deflate Photo
A ceramic
figurine called 'caganer' of Britain's Queen Elizabeth, is seen on show at the
Santa Llucia Fair on December 21, in Barcelona. Statuettes of well-known people
defecating are a strong Christmas tradition in Catalonia, dating back to the
18th century. Catalonians hide caganers in Christmas Nativity scenes and invite
friends to find them.
Peace.
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