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December 18, 2003 Thursday |
A viewer gave me this idea for the
above toon (see email below)
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Congressman Wants to Ban Obscene Words from Radio/TV
WOAI, TX - 12-18-03
Congressman Lamar Smith (R-San Antonio) has introduced a
bill that would specifically ban eight words and phrases from use in any
context on radio or TV. ...
The list of words is included in the above link...lol |
"Officials say that when they tried to interview Saddam
Hussein he was smug, curt and often sarcastic. Later, Saddam apologized and said
he was just doing his impression of Donald Rumsfeld." —Conan O'Brien
"They found several pairs of Saddam's boxer shorts in the
hut and, by the way, that is the closest we have come to finding weapons of mass
destruction." —David Letterman
More Republican Heroes
Geez, add these two to the
"illustrious list" of other GOP heroes--Rush(drug addict), Bill Bennett(gambler),
Dr. Laura(porn star), Linda Tripp(backstabbing friend) (have I forgotten
anyone?) and it makes Democratic politicians look like angels.
Reagans Decry Decision on Hinckley Visits
Carlisle Sentinel, PA - 12-18-03
... US District Judge Paul L. Friedman said John Hinckley
Jr. may have
six visits with his parents in the Washington area without staff ...
FROM: gjazspam@yahoo.com
Subject: Hi
Hi is code
word for elephant mail to come--
Lisa, I would love it
if you would "photoshop" a big
red clown nose on your photo! As a professional
graphic designer working at a major ad agency (making
a six figure salary) you give any artform a bad name.
Your email address has the word spam in it. How apropos.
My 12 year-old nephew could compose better photo
images than you. By the way, because of your hatred, I
am donating my generous tax-cut to Bush Cheney 2004.
Remember me in November 2004! I will be among millions
of "smirking chimps"!!! Good luck with
www.allbranotits.com.
You have sent me about 100 emails. I always knew republicans were
sadists but you prove they are masochists too--why else would you keep visiting
a website you despise? Knock yourself out! Hahahaha-thanks for
the laughs and the hits!
BTW my bra size is 38D....lol
"I'm watching the clip of Saddam Hussein with the big beard
and the whole thing and this might be a long shot in terms of theories are
concerned — but is it possible that in the nine months he was on the run, he was
actually studying to become a rabbi?" —Jon Stewart
I just love that show.
Subject: Bush as Saddam Cartoon
Listening to the BBC on Tuesday 12/16 at 5:00 AM, they
described a cartoon that I have been trying unsuccessfully to find. I didn't
know if you could point me in a direction. The cartoon was described as a George
Bush head with a flashlight being shined in his mouth a la Saddam. The cartoon
showed light being reflected OUT his ears, eyes and nose. SO right on SO many
levels. Any clue who did it or where it can be seen online?
Thx,
Doug V
Hope you enjoy the toon I did Doug.
Thanks for the inspiration. I tried for about an hour to find the toon you
described but no luck.
New year promises more drama in trials of corporate wrongdoing
Boston.com, MA - 12-18-03
... Martha Stewart, self-styled priestess
of the gracious lifestyle, goes on trial
in January, accused of lying about why she dumped a small chunk of stock ...
Democrats Make Enron GOP's Albatross
Washington Post, DC - 12-18-03
... lets a speech go by without saying President Bush
gave favorable tax treatment to
the likes of "Ken Lay and ... The very idea that people at the top of Enron ...
Click here to
donate
If you can't donate, at
least send me a Christmas Card!
All Hat No Cattle
PO Box 5237
Navarre, FL 32566
"A 78-year-old African American woman has come forward with
proof that she is the daughter of the late Senator Strom Thurmond. She was the
product of an affair young Strom Thurmond had with the family maid. Today, Rush
Limbaugh said 'Why can't I get a maid like that?'" —Jay Leno
Lisa, Has anyone touched on the possibility that Strom Thurmond
was guilty of "Statutory Rape"? Wonder what Ms Essie meant when she said
that she didn't want to ruin Thurmond's career as a "Hypocrite
Segregationist or a "Statutory Rapist"?/
---------------
Excerpt From Letter Reference:
She didn't want to hurt Strom Thurmond's career. That's why Essie Mae
Washington-Williams says she kept silent until now about her claim that
she is the one-time segregationist senator's mixed-race daughter, born out
of wedlock.Williams says her mother became pregnant at
age 16, while
serving as a maid in the Thurmond household.
Statutory Rape
Statutory rape is illegal sexual activity between two people when it would
otherwise be legal if not for their age. The actual ages for these laws
vary greatly from state-to-state, as do the punishments for offenders.
Many states do not use the actual term "statutory rape," simply calling it
rape or unlawful sexual penetration. These laws rarely apply only to
intercourse, but rather to any type of sexual contact. Dating someone
without sexual contact cannot be considered a form of statutory rape, and
is almost never illegal.
Jajot |
When did breaking the law ever stop
a Republican? Thanks for writing and all the info. AHNC viewers are
so smart!
Dear Lisa
Did you happen to see the Fox News staff celebrating the capture of Saddam
Hussein with scenes of Iraqis firing guns in the background? All I could think
about was that if the Fox staff had guns, they would have wiped out the News
Purification Office right upstairs.
JB
Hahahaha. It is a scary
thought that the Fox & Friends in the morning trio would be allowed to have
guns. Thanks for writing. I'm laughing as I type this! Hahahaha
The emailer above better not be able
to carry a weapon either!
Laura Bush's Annual Christmas Address
Click here for the article! It is so funny
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Dateline- Frikkinhot, Arizona
JOHN ASHCROFT CHASTISED BY FEDERAL JUDGE; LEGALLY CHANGES
NAME TO AVOID PROSECUTION!
In an exclusive interview granted to AHNC, Attorney General John Ashcroft
has told this reporter that he is going to have his name changed to avoid
the public stigma associated with being in trouble with a federal judge.
Ashcroft stated, "me and that judge have never got along. I think that he is
just jealous because I always get the attention." Ashcroft said, "I am going
to have my name changed to Grand Inquisitor Torquemada. It really does have
a nice ring to it, don't you think?" When asked about enraging the federal
judge, Ashcroft made this comment, "gag orders, contempt of court citations,
damn judges making laws, Constitution this and Constitution that, civil
rights, and you know what? I have just about had it with the liberals. They
are going to be the death of this wonderful country."
At this point, the Attorney General was starting to rave on and on and I had
to back away slowly. Mr. Ashcroft had this odd half-smile on his face and
his eyes glazed over. This is straight up Lisa, he was acting really creepy
so, I figured it was just about time to end the interview. So, there you
have it.
faithfully yours,
Don Nash
the Wild West Desk
AllHatNoCattle.net
Stickymud, Utah
Thanks for
your report Don. It's dangerous being a Democrat these days, eh?
|
Lightening, Prescott, AZ by Bob Witkowski
www.atwitsend.org
Peace.
| |
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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might
have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to
salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, About.com
Guide to Political Humor.
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