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Thursday edition - November 1, 2007
Definition of ambushery: The bungling of both military and mercenary operations
"The big story this week is the terrible wildfires here in California. ... President Bush arrived in San Diego, where he met with Governor Schwarzenegger. Our fate is in the hands of the only two American politicians who don't speak English." - Jimmy Kimmel
The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
Surprise, Surprise, More Money for Iraq Needed
The
demands of supplying soldiers in combat
require an additional 1,400 military and civilian personnel with the authority
to sign contracts, a new report finds.
Councilman supports investigating Giuliani's 9/11 failures
Disturbing News
We Don't Want Legal Aliens!!
The United States admitted only 450 Iraqi refugees in October, fewer than half the number it needs per month to meet a goal of 12,000 by the end of this budget year, according to State Department statistics
"FEMA had a phony press conference and they had FEMA members posing as reporters
asking them easy questions. They had no reporters there, just FEMA members. As
opposed to a disaster where it's all reporters and no FEMA members." --Jay
Leno Republican Shenanigans
"Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger is in a little trouble this week, little trouble for saying marijuana is not a drug, it is a leaf, it is a plant. He said marijuana is not a drug and today his approval rating in California, 99.99%" --Jay Leno
We Don't Need Bridge Repairs!
The House Transportation Committee approved scaled-back bridge safety legislation Wednesday, offered grudgingly by the chairman after his plan to pay for repairs with a gas tax increase fell flat.
Rock-The-Voter News
DEMS DEBATE ‘UFOS’: HILLARY’S ‘UNIDENTIFIED FLYING OBFUSCATIONS’
Did Rumsfeld's Memos Come Back To Haunt Him?
In a series of internal musings and memos to his staff, then-Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld argued that Muslims avoid "physical labor" and wrote of the need to "keep elevating the threat," "link Iraq to Iran" and develop "bumper sticker statements" to rally public support for an increasingly unpopular war.
"Folks,
when I decided to run for president I did not do it for attention. I did it to
fulfill a dream of being the most popular man in the world. But the media can't
keep their sticky hands out of my populous pie. Look at these headlines: ABC
NEWS, 'Colbert Campaign May Run Afoul of Law;' Politico, 'Colbert 'run' risks
breaking law;' Outside the Beltway, 'Colbert Run May Violate Federal Election
Law.' For the record, I would never knowingly violate any federal election laws.
Luckily, I don't know any federal election laws." --Stephen Colbert
Biz-Tech News
MSNBC's Keith Olbermann parses what he calls Bush's "tantrum" yesterday.
"Waterboarding" is not torture. It's a surfing term, for God's sake. - Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
Don't Ask, Don't Tell
President Bush, seeking to salvage the nomination of Michael Mukasey as attorney general, on Thursday defended the former judge's refusal to say whether he considers waterboarding as illegal torture.
Bush-Prison-Torture News
Dubya - Don Wiley Quixote
Cheney tortures his dogs - AP Photo
Go-F***-Yourself News
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In this artist's portrayal by Aurore Simonnet of Sonoma State University, the black hole lies at the upper left and its companion star is on the right. US astronomers discovered the biggest black hole orbiting a star 1.8 million light-years from Earth in the constellation Cassiopeia, with a record-setting mass of 24 to 33 times that of our Sun, NASA said Tuesday. Photo/NASA
Peace.
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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, About.com Guide to Political Humor.
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